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THE FOUNDATION OF ANY RELATIONSHIP 2

Hi beautiful people, its another weekend. Thank God its friday. We will continue our discussion on helpful tips to improve relationships. If you missed the first part click THE FOUNDATION OF ANY RELATIONSHIP

To harness the be best out of any relationship and to build solid relationships with our family, friends, lovers etc. you have to build yourself first.

  • Be consistent. Some weaknesses are born out of bad habits. Letting go of bad habits take consistency and strong will. No habit is innate (inborn). Every habit was picked up in one way or the other. We are all responsible for our habits whether good or bad. Constant repetition births a habit. Bad habits are easy to develop but difficult to live with. Practice good habits. We do not need miracles we need better habits.
  • Write down your dreams and Goals. This gives you a sense of direction and inspires you. It gives you a reason for constant communion with self. If you do not know where you are going, you will be unable to get there.
  • Define yourself and standards. Know what you should and shouldn’t do. Where to be found and where not to be found, the kind of friends to keep etc. if you lack standards (S.I units), no one will place a value on you or identify your placement. You’ll be just another floating number. A very random one.
  • Understand your personality and let it shine through. Your personality is a distinguishing factor that is unique to you alone.
  • Be confident in yourself. Trust yourself and believe in yourself. Trust strengthens marriages, friendships, etc. and will definitely strengthen self love.
  • Never let people define or discourage you. No matter what you do people will always criticize. Accept good criticism and discard the chaff. Live for yourself and not for people. Life is too short to waste trying to please people. See gossips as jobless but necessary publicist with the duty of increasing the world’s knowledge of you.
  • Have positive dialogue with yourself. Think positive thoughts. You are who you think you are. Counter and dispel negative thinking. You will never rise above the image you have of yourself.
  • Don’t let your pasts or mistakes define you. Learn from your mistakes and past experiences, don’t wallow in self pity or hide in its shadow. Your mistakes should strengthen your innovative capacity. Think up new ways of doing things.  Your pasts should motivate and challenge you. Be better so you can save people the stress of making the same mistakes you’ve made. Inspire someone to be a success with your success with your success story.
  • Speak to your hearing. When you speak, hear and believe something, you unconsciously walk and work towards it. The more you hear and say a thing, the easier it is to believe and embody it. Speak words to strengthen yourself.
  • Eliminate atelophobia. Atelophobia is the fear of not being good enough or imperfection or  an extreme fear of failing to achieve perfection. ELIMINATE IT!!!
  • Complement yourself and acknowledge yourself when you do something good.
  • Take yourself out on a treat.

Most importantly, I THINK YOU ARE AWESOME, DON’T FORGET THAT!!!

Practice the following and watch the quality of your relationships elevate. Have an awesome weekend.

Photo credits: David Adelakun (Taiwo Adelakun Photography)

Model: Ojiyovbi Ebasa

Love,

Einsteinette.

THE LETTER

My sweet baby,
As this pen touches this paper, smiles takeover my face and heart. Overwhelming joy and warmth fills me. God chose me to be the shelter for you for nine months and I’m glad that he finally sent my own angel to me to cool me off in the midst of the fire of earth. My love, you are a blessing and I treasure you. You saved me from shape and restored my dark clouds. I’m sure you’re confused. Ids explain:
Your father and I were so in love. They say all men are the same but he was a unique breed, different from anyone I have ever met. If there was a word that could separate him from the human race, I think “Angel” would suit him perfectly. He had a big heart. We got married and lived happily until dark clouds rested on our roof. His family harassed me constantly because I couldn’t bear a child for their son. They never really accepted me into the family because I was poor. My mother died while giving birth to me. When I was 16 my father died of cancer because we didn’t have sufficient money for the hospital bills. My uncle took care of me till I met your father. He became everything to me in spite of his family’s opinion about me. He never loved me less, he didn’t cheat and he never left my side. He dried my tears and encouraged me. In the midst of our trips to the hospital to find a solution to my bareness, the doctor discovered I had an ovarian cancer. We decided to take the risk of operation.
It’s been 10years since I got married. The operation took place 8years ago and just when I was about giving up, you came my way. I am so happy that you are here with me now. I know everyday you’ll wonder where your father is, he died two months after we received the good news that I was finally pregnant in a car crash. Too bad he won’t witness your birth but I’m sure he’ll always look out for you from wherever he is.
Don’t be sad my child, you have me. I’d never leave your side. Anytime you need me I’d be there. I’d be your mother, father, sister, brother, playmate, best friend and anything you want if only you let me. I won’t let you slip into the wrong path because I care too much to lose you to the evil claws of “pampering”. I love you. Words are not enough to communicate how I feel about your presence in my life. Life has dealt with me but it handed me a precious gift to wipe away my sorrows, YOU. Remember never to give up on life. Don’t Quit! You are the ruler of your world and what becomes of it is determined by what you create in it. Never let challenges weigh you down. Depend totally on God because even when everyone leaves and everything fails, he’ll be there. Control your mind and you’ll be able to control your world. Never let people determine your path for you. Follow your passion. You are a brave child and you’ll succeed in all you do. I will always be here to support you whenever you need me, until God feels it’s time for me to go. I love you.
Yours forever,
Your Mum (would be any other thing for you).

Love,

Einsteinette.

10 PILLARS TO BUILD FROM VALUE Orientation

Hi, I know you’ve missed me, well, I’m back and I hope nothing takes me away again. Today, we will be discussing the preceding posts on value orientation (if you have not read it, click VALUE ORIENTATION, (Read it now!!! else you will feel lost ). There are salient points in the story that I believe would be relevant to you and these points are important because they will support and strengthen you in your self development journey and the rate of improvement will alarm you.

The ten pillars are:

  1. Be eager to learn and engage in further research. Never feed on incomplete information or haphazard information. Get your facts right. Further and recent knowledge/information is priceless.
  2. Find S2: When you identify a problem, find the source and solution. Be a creative solution provider not a professional complaint director.
  3. Be well equipped before undertaking any task. It puts you far ahead. Not everyone has to start from scratch. With information you can start from the middle to the top.
  4. Never be in a hurry to make money. Nothing good comes easy. Be patient and work for every penny you earn directly or indirectly, be sure you deserve it. Fast money evaporates quickly. Build lasting empires and assets.
  5. Decisions are integral in defining and shaping your life and its eventual outcome. Never be in a hurry to make decisions. Take out time to ponder, weigh your options and come up with a decision even if it is a risk-taking decision.
  6. Never base your decisions on emotions. Emotions cloud judgments. Never make a decision under pressure (except you have to), stress, extreme excitement, depression, anger etc. because you will most likely make a bad decision.
  7. Set out an accurate plan, with clear goals and strategies on how to execute a task before undertaking the task.
  8. Ignorance is much more expensive than the price of education. If you do not know the value of a thing, the worth and potential of that thing will remain vague to you and might hinder your success or advancement. Knowledge of value guarantees advancement.
  9. Be aware of and familiar with the potential and treasures in your vicinity before embarking on an ultimate treasure search in a strange land. A goat at hand is better than a lion in the forest
  10. Never give up!!! Suicide is never a solution. Face your challenges. Don’t run away from them. People with the best success stories had terrible experiences and challenges that toughened them up and prepared them for the positions they are now. e.g Oprah Winfrey

If there are other lessons you learnt from the article, Value Orientation, kindly share by commenting. Add to someone’s life and inspire a friend today by sharing this post. If you haven’t read value orientation, click here. Have a nice weekend.

Love,

Einsteinette.

Value Orientation 2

If you missed the first part of this click VALUE Orientation . Enjoy reading…

…He said ‘I want a mine of diamonds’ and he lay awake all night.

Early the next morning he sought the priest. The priest always gets crossed when awakened early in the morning. Ali was too curious to care, he shook the priest out of his dreams  and said to him

‘Will you tell me where I can find diamonds?’

‘Diamonds! What do you want diamonds for?

‘Why? I wish to be immensely rich’

‘Well, then, go and find them and then you can have them’

‘But I don’t know where to go’

‘Well, if you find a river that runs through white sand, between high mountains in those white sands you will always find diamonds. I don’t believe there’s any such river’

‘Of course there are plenty of them across the globe. All I have to do is go and find them and have them, I will go’ Ali concluded.

 

He sold his 3 farms, collected the money and left his family under the care of a neighbor and he went in search of the diamonds, but never found anything. He came to Palestine, then wandered on into Europe, and at last when his money was spent and he was in rags, wretchedness, and poverty, he stood on the shore of that bay at Barcelona, in Spain when one day a tidal wave came rolling in between the Pillars of Hercules and the poor, afflicted, suffering, dying man could not resist the temptation to cast himself in the incoming tide and sank beneath its foaming crest never to rise in this life again.

The man who purchased Ali’s barren farm and house, went to the farm one day and tried to make ridges, as he dug, his hoe struck a stone. Ali’s successor noticed a curious flash of light from the white sands of the stream. He pulled out a stone having an eye of light reflecting all the hues of the rainbow. He took the pebble into the house and put it on the mantel piece and forgot all about it.

A few days later the priest came and visited Ali’s successor, and the moment he opened that drawing room door he saw a flash of light and, he rushed to it and shouted ‘has Ali returned? Here is a diamond!!!’

‘Oh no, Ali has not returned and that is not a diamond. That is nothing but a stone I found right here in our own garden.’

‘But’, said the priest, ‘I tell you I know a diamond when I see it. I know positively that this is a diamond’

They rushed to the stream in that old barren farm and found a shack buried there and Ali’s successor became immensely rich and influential from the sales of diamond.

The points to derive will be stated next week.

Love,

Einsteinette.

VALUE Orientation

Ali owned three very large farms. He was a rich and contented man. He had three kids, two sons and a daughter. His wife died giving birth to their daughter. He loved his kids and provided as much as he could for them. All his farmlands produced bountiful yields except one. That particular farm never yielded anything not even a leaf. It was behind his house and the biggest farmland he had. It amazed him because it was close to a stream.

One day he sat outside his house enjoying the fresh air, trying to decide what to do with his barren and infertile land, when his friend, an ancient Buddhist priest, one of the wise men of the east walked into the compound to see him. Ali welcomed him and they talked about lots of things over wine. The wise man told the old farmer a story of how this world was once a mere bank of fog, and the almighty thrust His finger around, increasing the speed until at last He whirled this bank of fog into a solid ball of fire. It went rolling through the universe, burning its way through other banks of fog, and condensed the moisture without, until it fell in floods of rain upon its hot surface, and cooled the outward crust. Then the internal fires bursting outward through the crust threw up the mountains and hills, the valleys, the plains and prairies of this wonderful world of ours. If this internal molten mass came bursting outward and cooled very quickly it became granite, less quickly copper, less quickly silver, less quickly gold, and after gold, diamonds were made.

The old priest told him that ‘A diamond is a congealed drop of sunlight.’ Now they say that is literally true, that a diamond is an actual deposit of carbon from the sun. The old priest told Ali that if he had one diamond the size of this thumb he could purchase the county, and if he had a mine of diamonds he could place his children thrones through the influence of their great wealth.

Ali heard all about diamonds, how much they worth and went to bed that night discontented with his current state and thirsty for diamonds. He said, ‘I want a mine of diamonds,’ and he… (To be Continued)

Love,
Einsteinette.